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My boyfriend, Zach, accepted a job in Massachusetts and is currently in his hometown living with his parents. Until we can find housing and myself a job, I am stuck in South Carolina – 830 miles away. The distance isn’t easy, especially since we lived together before, but these tips below have really helped us and I would love to share them with others in our same situation.
1. Call/text every day. Talk to each other as much as possible. The distance seems so much shorter when you have the ability to talk every day. My favorite thing my boyfriend does is call me in the morning to tell me “Good morning beautiful” and how much he loves me. He does the same thing at night as well.
2. Don’t be afraid to tell the other person when something is bothering you, or if you’re having a weak moment. I can’t tell you how many times I have cried on the phone with Zach when he first moved. It was almost a nightly occurrence. However, being able to talk to him about it made it better.
3. Pick a tv/movie to watch together on Facetime or Skype. Unfortunately, where Zach lives currently has no internet connection so we don’t get to Facetime that often, but when he stays with other family members we do. We will always watch tv together and talk about it. It really makes me feel like he’s actually here.
4. Care packages. Once a month I make Zach a care package. Inside of it is usually a baked good, some love letters, and something I made or bought him. This past month I went to Build-a-bear and made him a New York Yankees bear.
5. Love letters. When Zach first moved I started writing him love letters. I love being able to write my feelings down for him that he can read over and over again. It really helps ease the pain of him being so far away.
6. Tell them you love them often. If you are to that point in your relationship, let them know everyday. I’m sure if someone could read Zach and my conversations between texts they’d think we were two crazy people. Most of it is just “I love you” back and forth.
7. Talk about non-sense. Our texts are also riddled with random speech back and forth to each other. We will just randomly text the other one that we are tired or hungry. It really makes us feel closer.
8. Trust them. Zach works 80-hour days right now and luckily he has the ability text and talk most days but there are some when he can’t. When your other half moves away trust them completely. When you don’t trust them it makes things a whole lot harder.
9. Remind them. Remind your other half why you love them and everything you love about them. Remind them of the first day you met. Remind them the first day you fell in love with them.
10. Talk about the future. If you are at this point in your relationship, talk about the future together and your lives. Tell them about your dreams for your future life together. I love being able tell Zach my dreams of our future together. It makes the distance seem worth it.
11. Have a song. Have a song that is “your” song together. Ours is Home by Edward Sharpe. Whenever you hear it on the radio or your playlist, it will immediately make your day better.
12. Plan. Plan in advance when you are going to visit your other half. Get a countdown app on your phone. Countdown the days and it makes every day that inches closer seem so much sweeter. I keep every single date we have planned all the way to November on my phone.
13. Snapchat. I love Snapchat for the simple reason that I can send quick selfies to Zach and him to me. They don’t take up space on my phone. I will also snap stuff of my day to him. I think it’s a great app for couples, especially those of us who are long distance.
14. Be silly. Tell jokes, be silly, be yourself, and a little bit goofy. Laughing is always the best medicine and making your other half laugh or vice versa is the best medicine.
15. Be strong. If this is the worst part of your life to come, things can only get better.
My name is Lindsay and I’m a graduate of Coastal Carolina University. My boyfriend, Zach, and myself are in a long distance relationship between Massachusetts and South Carolina.
photo © 2012 Sonia Belviso, Flickr