Not long ago it was that my views towards long distance relationships were completely different than today’s. Today and for the last 10 months, I, a girl from San Diego, have been in a long distance relationship with an Aussie, and the Pacific Ocean lays in between us (7,960 miles).
A year ago, my views towards long distance lovers were not favoring, but never meant to offend. I used to believe that these relationships were nothing but a mere fantasy that people liked to fall for.
I used to believe that people went on fishing for a wonderful story to tell their acquaintances and friends of how they fell in love with someone from distant lands.
Yet, the most important one was finding LDRs as not the safest way to devote and give your heart to someone whom you may not know their true intentions. Catfishing? Yes, I mean catfishing.
I was skeptical about how relationships could be authentic and successful when there was no physical contact and how the relationship was so vulnerable to lies lies and lies. I considered that it was awfully easy to make up stories and a life we don’t have and paint this fantasy world to a person who doesn’t really know us enough to know if what we’re saying is true and vice versa. Internet and social media is powerful and is at the reach of everyone, who knows who you may run into in it. So that’s where the skepticism came from.
These views started to slowly changed when I met my Aussie.
At the time, summer break had started and staying up late was my way to “celebrate it”. With this being said, there’s not many people who enjoy staying up late with you just for the sake of it. So with nothing to do, I went online and started chatting with strangers. Was I defying my beliefs about online strangers? Maybe, maybe not. I tried keeping it the least personal as possible with the strangers I chatted, all until a particular Aussie and I connected and started chatting.
Long story short, after a great conversation and adding each other on skype, I thought that night would be the end of it, but I was completely wrong (really glad I was). Fast-forwarding a year, I see that I am in a long distance relationship, and my mindset about them is somewhat different.
There are thoughts that still have not changed throughout this time, and probably will not be changing anytime soon. Some of these are internet being a hazardous place to meet a potential love if a person is not being careful, and that in fact, there can still be lies, lies, and more lies in an ldr if communication and honesty lacks. Last but definitely not least, how there are individuals that find satisfaction in setting people up for disappointment. Catfishing? You are correct again, I mean catfishing!
Now, my views about long distance relationships that have been adjusted are the majority. Throughout the whole year, and counting, of knowing each other and a little more than 10 months of being in an ldr, I now know and feel the struggle long distance couples go through every day. Scheduling phone/video calls, sending pictures of any activity throughout the day when it is clear we’d love it if our significant other was with us experiencing it as well, the need of a tender hug or kiss when things are off, etc., may not be favoring for the heart. The struggle is real, you and I know it.
I now, strongly believe that people do not simply go fishing for a cute story to tell their friends, it just happens. When you meet someone who makes a great impact on you, and you realize you’ve started to have feelings for an individual that stands far away from you (physically), it is inevitable and from then on, it depends on the two. It takes two to tango. Planned or unplanned, it simply happens.
I’ve grown to understand that a relationship can sure work even when it is lacking physical contact. Yes, you cannot feel them physically, but having their complete support, their comforting words, a trust that has been built even when the miles are in between, a love that crosses distance and barriers, and a strong bond of communication, may not be the same, but they sure make up a great supplement for it.
Thinking how perspectives can be altered in such a short time is surreal, but I could not be any happier to realize this.
My perception about long distance relationship surely changed. What about yours? Have your thoughts about LDRs been adjusted throughout time or have they always been the same? Share your thoughts with me on the comment section, I would really like to hear what you have to say.