Being in a long distance relationship is hard, of that there is no doubt, and it often takes a whole lot of flexibility, patience and understanding to get through it.
Sometimes seeing the ease with which other people conduct their relationships (together – whilst you and your love are apart) can be a source of upset as you long for the physical closeness you cannot currently have.
Sometimes there are just too many really lonely times and it can be hard to see the positives, so, that is why I am going to share some of the things that I found were good about my LDR.
These things helped my husband and I get through our 4 years apart, and I hope they will provide a little bit of positivity to anyone in a similar situation.
There is positivity to be found in:
- having time to get to know who you are and what you bring to a relationship (I found I spent quite a bit of time, because I had the space to do it, to think about what I wanted out of my relationship)
- missing someone (you get to think about the one you love, and exactly what you love about them which reminds you how lucky you really are)
- having to communicate long distance (you develop a really strong set of communication skills and I found I developed the ability to talk more openly about feelings and opinions)
- looking forward to seeing your partner (it makes being with them a point of great happiness and you get to have a focal point that keeps you going during the tougher times)
- having a difficult start (there is no doubt that my husband and I feel closer and stronger together now that we are reunited)
Oddly enough, I would say that during our time apart, I got to know my husband more than I think I would have if we had been together the whole time.
This comes down to really making the effort to spend the little time we had in the best way possible – developing that key communication and making sure that everything counted. You learn not to get caught up in little annoyances or arguments, and this is something you carry forward to the time you are together.
So, would I change being in an LDR? Never. Do I treasure the time we had apart and the way it has made our reconnection stronger? Always.
Stay strong and hang on in there because it really is worth every moment you have to wait!