“Nothing makes a room feel emptier than wanting someone in it.” ― J
There are many emotions we feel that we struggle to find the words for. When we finally find the word to express our emotions, we feel good knowing that now we have a word for it.
Saudade is a portuguese word that represents the aching feeling you experience when you’re away from someone you love.
At times we can feel so overcome by saudade that we wonder how we can continue a long distance relationship. Fortunately, there are ways that we can cope with saudade when we feel it most. And like many things, it’s always good to look at examples of how others in a similar situation dealt with it.
Let’s take a look at some real long distance bloggers have overcome feelings of saudade.
Defining something like saudade is not something simple or that can be taught in a classroom. Most people have felt this emotion at some point or another, and when in a long distance relationship, this feeling becomes all too familiar. So let me break it down for you. Saudade, in it’s broadest terms, is the feeling or ache you feel when missing someone or something.
It’s easy to be consumed by the crippling doubt, fear, and worry that comes with having a partner a thousand miles away and having no definitive plan for closing the distance. There are highs and there are lows, and the lows can be really low. It’s important to keep yourself busy and active so you aren’t feeling sorry for yourself. After all, as they say a relationship shouldn’t become your life it should enhance it.
For days when I’m not feeling incredibly creative I like to trade in the blog posts for some Netflix. Watching a movie I’ve never seen before helps keep my mind off of missing Jay (provided it’s not one of those chick flick movies). Sometimes I like to watch movies that Jay and I have seen together. It helps me remember more happy occasions and that happiness starts to overshadow my saudade. If I start a new show on Netflix this also helps me by shifting my focus from missing Jay to learning about all of these new characters’ lives.
We all can overcome this emotion we all have. There are a lot of distractions to let this feeling inside us go away for a little time. And usually, I do take time for myself: spend an hour on what I love to do, maybe watch a movie or maybe listen to cheerful songs. Most of the time, I spend time writing drafts for future blog posts and just keep myself so busy that I will forgot that I am actually feeling sad and down.
I was 4-5 years old when my parents broke up. I remember my mom crying more than usual around that time and I asked her why she was crying. She didn’t explain, she just told me that crying cleans your soul and it is good for you to cry if you feel like crying. I took that advice and it has been one of the best advice I’ve ever got. The best thing to do when coping with sadness is to cry if you feel like it. After vigorously sobbing on my bed, I have always felt so much better, like, indeed, my soul had just been cleaned. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Crying is natural and dealing with your feelings is really important to your mental health.
Sometimes reading about how others dealt with feelings similar to our own can help us to find solutions to problems that we just couldn’t see before. Did any of the posts, tips and experiences of these bloggers help you out? Hopefully they did!
If you’d like to read more tips and experiences on how other real long distance couples were able to deal with saudade, you can find even more valuable tips and experiences from even more long distance bloggers by clicking the image on the right.
And if you’d like to share your own experience dealing with saudade, you can do so by leaving a comment & sharing your own valuable tips with us!