Dear Mind Over Miles,
How do you deal with the physical aspect of your LDR? I know that at the moment I’m finding it super hard because I just can’t hug my boyfriend when he needs it, and he can’t hug me when I do. I just miss physical contact. Do you have any tips?
-719kmsFromHim
Dear 719kmsFromHim,
Many people, despite being physically together never experience a “meeting of the minds”. It’s something that many people are not aware of. But unlike physical intimacy, it’s highly underrated. So no matter what you’re feeling or thinking, share as much as possible with each other.
Sharing thoughts, ideas, opinions, dreams, future plans, and fears are what make up emotional intimacy. They more you share the closer you will become. Find ways to “wrap your words around each other”. You may not be able to give him a hug but you can know him well enough to be able to say the perfect thing that will comfort him.
Another tip I’d give you is to make the most of the time you do have together. Visits go by so fast! So make sure you both come away feeling loved. When you’re apart, make plans and think about the activities that you will do together. Discuss them so that you can both anticipate these things together. This will make you feel closer and you won’t feel like you wasted a second of your time together.
Lastly, take advantage of the tools and technology that we have available these days. Talk on the phone often, use Skype, send each other cute things in the mail, play online games etc… Be there for each other as much as possible and always open up to each other. Be emotionally intimate when you’re apart and you will feel closer than ever.
